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Parental Resilience-what is our role?
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Overprotecting our young children can backfire later 0 Cindy Bess You might have heard the terms "helicopter parents," "hover mothers," or "Snowplow Parenting"  over the past few years,  You also might have seen the news stories where college students are seeking counseling after being devastated when they only get "B+" on a test or paper, or are staging dramatic protests against professors perceived to be unfair or too hard in their course expectations or grading policy.  In some (or perhaps many) cases, these two factors might directly correlate, for when parents prevent their children from being disappointed, or step in and either defend or excuse their behavior when they get in trouble, they deny their children the chance to learn from their mistakes and/or occasional poor choices while they are young, and destine them to be unable to manage life's inevitable hard moments when older.  Children need to discover from a very early age that when one falls down when taking an early step it might be momentarily uncomfortable, however with a little effort and encouragement one can rise to the occasion, stand up, take another step and go forward.  It is in the act of rising up and moving on that one acquires one of the greatest personal  characteristics - resilience.
by Cindy Bess
Tuesday, July 5, 2016
Every day parents serve as role models for their children 0 Cindy Bess If parents are aware of this fact, they can monitor their own behavior and demonstrate to their children positive coping mechanisms, effective stress management techniques and productive ways to interact socially.  Children see what their parents do on a daily basis and emulate their actions.   One possibility is to laugh more by incorporating humor into one's daily life experience.  As they say, "Laughter is the best medicine" and can be quite useful when enduring stressful experiences.  It is never good to laugh AT someone who is experiencing trouble or upset, but finding the funny in a circumstance and developing a sense of humor is one of the four characteristics  that resilient children exhibit. [Breslin, D. 2005 "Children's Capacity to Develop Resiliency: How to Nurture It."  Young Children 60 (1): 47-52.]   
by Cindy Bess
Tuesday, July 5, 2016


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